My eldest cousin, Sapna, passed away last night.
She was born with mental challenges. She couldn’t speak in full sentences. Couldn’t cook a meal. Couldn’t go anywhere on her own. She needed help with everything. And yet she smiled when she saw me. Every single time. We weren’t close. But she remembered me. Somehow, through all the noise in her head, through all the confusion and dependence, she remembered me.
Her younger brother is my age. He devoted his entire life to her. Carried her weight quietly, without any bitterness. If love is meant to be unconditional, I’ve only truly seen it in him. He never complained. Never tried to escape it. He made her laugh. And when she laughed, it was like the rules of this world temporarily didn’t apply.
I’ve always wondered why she was born this way. And why most of us, born with everything she didn’t get, take it for granted.
There is no obvious purpose in her life story. She didn’t overcome anything. She didn’t defy odds. She simply was. She existed. For 42 years. Dependent. Fragile. Innocent in a way we’ve forgotten how to be.
People is saying uski mukti ho gayi. That she is free now.
But I am not. I feel broken. Uneasy. Like a structure inside me has cracked. I am thinking of her parents. Her brother. Everyone who was remotely touched by her presence. I am conflicted myself. I don’t know what the point of all this is.
Why are some lives loud and destructive and long and get away with everything? While others, like hers, are quiet, invisible, and go too early?
What is this system? Who is running it?
Why is life handed out so unevenly? And why do the people who get the most waste it so easily?
She asked for nothing. She harmed no one. She stayed a child in an adult body. Maybe that’s closer to grace than anything we’ll ever be.
And somehow, in being that way, she gave more than most of us ever do.
Now that she’s gone, the silence feels enormous. But it’s not empty.
It holds the way she smiled when she saw you. The way her brother looked after her. The way love sometimes doesn’t need to be explained or earned.
Rest in peace, Sapna Di. You're beyond the body that kept you so limited. Go fly now and get whatever you couldn't in this life.
Love, SS.
It's a answer that's probably cannot be put into words. Sapna di will never be forgotten, maybe the almighty has not blessed her the normal way but you know what she will be remembered time and again in your memories , in your words , your silence , your smile and tears together. Sapna di and every one associated with her especially her brother is gold may Allah grant the highest ranks in Jannah. Ameen. Allah does this to recognise that we should always be greatful no matter what. And sapna di is a living example of all of that. God is just , all source code , he is the planner the master it's his plan that will prevail, Not ours. Let god do that, keep praying and me too.